eighteen is the loneliest number

something very relevant to whose reality.

today i feel so old.
now that i'm 18, it really sucks.
might go off and buy some lottery tickets or something
to validate the fact that i'm eighteen.
i would buy alcohol if i wasn't so against it,
maybe i can buy it for my friends,
not that i would endorse them to drink.


i wonder what people mean when they say partying?
do they mean dancing, or eating or drinking, talking?
well maybe it's a collective term,
i mean when people say "let's party all night"
what exactly am will i be doing?
partying? yes i know but really, what would i be doing?
partying means for me is to go a party,
but you can't go to parties all night
unless you leave and then come back repeatedly
but then thats weird and people will be like wtf?


there's only 2 weeks before end of term
which means everything's rushed to get things done.
i also have to finish yearbook stuff.
i hate how there's not enough photos for me to use.
i feel bad because i really haven't done much,
but i am trying,
it's just that i think illustrator hates me
and always screws and hence makes me lose my file
which means i have restart the page,
and i have restarted my page so many times.


and and i have another idol,
well i did like her before but i wasn't really looking up to her.
well it's vanessa hudgens.
i watched her on ellen,
and she's just really poist and bubbly.
i thinks she handles herself so well.
and i love how she talks,
she's so confident and fun and very sociable.
despite all the scandals.
if i was on ellen, there would be many awkward silences.
yes i kinda have a thing for debaters/talkative people,
in non-weird way...




i'm tired and should be studying,
so laters.
sorry for the lack of flow in my post structure.



Love Squealer